Grandma Oliver was your stereotypical Grandma if you will. She had the beautiful white hair for as long as I've been alive and she dressed very conservatively just like Grandma's do. I'll never forget her famous "Gram glasses" that she wore. I don't think she ever had another pair of glasses... Those were her stylin' specks for sure! She loved spoiling her Grandchildren by buying the newest games, books, and of course sending money for everything… She hosted the many family get-togethers at her house in Valporaiso, Indiana and when she did… You better believe that there were about twenty different types of desserts or bowls of sweets laying around… She knew how to make everyone happy! She loved sitting in her cozy chair and telling stories, many of them lasting hours! I remember getting into so much trouble as a kid because I referred to my little sister, Abbey as "Little Ilo." Abbey always seemed to talk as a little girl, so during a Thanksgiving meal in Albuquerque (With Gram there) I called Abbey, "Little Ilo." My mother about died! Gram loved talking about any and everything, she was intelligent and knew so much because she chose to educate herself on so many things! She always had a new good book in hand, her crossword puzzles by her side and of course some sort of treat on a little napkin that was usually gone before I knew what it was.
When we came to visit our family, we'd stay at Gram's house, upstairs… Well, upstairs was where she had kept all her furniture AND bedding from when my Dad and his sisters grew up! The beds were like boards and the fabric of the bedding was just SO 60s and 70s!!!!! However, I wouldn't have slept anywhere else though, that was Gram's house and it was so cozy and warm! One of my favorite places to be! She had the coolest little George Washington face that was somehow on her stairs! It was a marking in the wood that looked just like him, and we loved looking at it every time we were there… She wasn't able to go upstairs her last few years because of her knees, so she always did her best to make sure we had everything we needed up there… (Thanks to my Aunt Nan, she made sure it was just right!) There was a basement in Gram's house that housed many treasures from long ago, many that had been untouched and had that "old smell" to it. We loved looking through stuff to get a glimpse of what her life was like years ago, even the bills from my Grandpa's business. Gram had a computer in her house that I remember always passing by and asking, "Does Gram even know how to use this thing?" Not sure if she did but, she chose to spend her time doing other things…
She looked out her window from her chair to see all the beautiful birds that came to the birdhouses my Dad and Uncle built for her. The last few years she even started watching a lot of golf because she knew Jesse was playing, and she started to follow along and become familiar with the golf slang! She could have a nice in depth conversation with Jes about it, that's how brilliant she was, she just understood things because she was a listener. Don't get me wrong, our Gram LOVED talking but she was the greatest listener too. She waited until you were done talking and she never disagreed with you! She was always so kind with her words and expressed her opinions in a way that was so gentle and sincere. She was an educator for 26 years and understood that every person (adult or child) was unique and that acceptance wasn't a choice. She loved everyone and found something to converse about with every single person. I can't imagine how many lives she touched as a teacher in Indiana! I would have loved to be Gram's student! I'm sure she was old fashioned in her ways, but I'll bet they worked!
I remember coming home from somewhere and it was late…. Gram was up, waiting in her chair and watching T.V. She was a night owl and loved falling asleep in her blue velvety chair. It was always so cute to walk in the back door just to see that little white hair poking over the top of the chair… Not by much though. Gram became such a tiny little thing these past few years. It was very hard on her not to have the freedom of driving anymore, so my Aunts and Uncles were so good to her by driving her places so she could get out and feel some sort of independence. She loved the game Mahjong. She had her Mahjong group every Tuesday I think and Lordy Lordy, you did NOT interfere with that! That event was set in stone and nothing would change it! She loved playing cards and any sort of game… I think she just loved being with her family and seeing the excitement on everyone's faces. She never wanted or cared to win, but it was the fact of the matter. Once, she was playing a game of Headbands and had a card on her head that said, "Goat." Well, she kept asking for clues and finally she shouted, "Am I a BED?" hehe! Gram was funny even though she probably wasn't trying to be. She made us laugh!
She was a lady. A true lady! She used her manners ALL THE TIME, she was very private with her personal matters and never intruded into yours. She always excused herself from the table or a conversation and was so polite in doing so. She was a nice reminder that kindness, and sincerity were traits that everyone enjoyed being around. Sometimes I just wanted to see Gram mad or upset… But nope! She never was! She's probably the only person I have ever known that was never mad at anyone (at least she wouldn't tell you or talk about it.)
She's been without our Grandpa Oliver for about 25 years now, and it was time. It was time for her to reunite with her love and be able to dance with him again. Her body physically gave out on her well before her mind did. It was tough to see her struggle to even get up and walk. And it killed us (and her) to see her confused and mixing up her thoughts and words. It really bothered her and she would let you know it. I would tell her that it was ok, after that many years, there had to be some sort of tangling of your "brain wires." She laughed, but that didn't make it better. She was a sharp lady and didn't like feeling like she couldn't remember things. My dad told us that the nurses working at her assisted living home came in to say their goodbye's when we all knew it would be soon. They were even tearful. Up until her very last days, she touched lives. People loved her and she didn't have to try very hard for that to happen. I was able to see some pictures of Gram her last couple of days, even hours and even though she looked very different from what I remember, she looked peaceful. That's all I can describe it as. She hung on to life until all 4 of her children could come be with her. However, just like Gram would, she went to be with the Lord when they stepped out of the room. I had a feeling she would. Surrounded by her loving family, what a way to leave this Earth and go to your eternal home with Jesus! Even though I wish I could have loved on her those last few days, I'm grateful for the time we had together and the memories I'll always hold close to my heart.
I'll always remember Gram for the countless amount of good things she brought to our lives. She was a beautiful person and now is a beautiful angel in Heaven. As I sit outside with our Little Oliver I am reminded daily of her beauty. She will always live on through all of us and I can't wait to see her again someday in the most beautiful place there is. Thank you Gram for sending the beautiful butterflies that float across our yard, and the blooming pretty pink roses to let me know that you are peaceful and in Heaven with our Father. I'll love you forever!
 |
| Gram feeding me as a baby. |
 |
| Gram and I doing what we do best. |
 |
| Court and I with our Gram. She loved wearing her turquoise when she came to visit! |
 |
| Ready to play a game or eat a treat I think. |
 |
| Our two precious Grandmother's. Walking together in Heaven. |
 |
| She loved flowers and nature. |
 |
| Any excuse to celebrate, she did! |
